UNTH 1
TEXT
It is humorous essay. But after reading it you will surely find that the author is most serious in writing it.
Is There Life on Earth?
There was great excitement on the planet of Venus this week. For the first time Venusian scientists managed to land a satellite on the plant Earth, and is has been sending back signals as well as photographs ever since.
The satellite was directed into an area know as Manhattan (named after the great Venusian astronomer Prof. Manhattan, who first discovered it with his telescope 20,000 light years ago).
Because of excellent weather conditions and extremely strong signals, Venusian scientists were able to get valuable information as to the feasibility of a manned flying saucer landing on Earth. A press conference was held at the Venus Institute of Technology.
"We have come to the conclusion, based on last week's satellite landing," Prof. Zog said, "that there is no life on Earth."
"How do you know this?" the science reporter of the Venus Evening Star asked.
"For one thing, Earth's surface in the area of Manhattan is composed of solid concrete and nothing can grow there. For another, the atmosphere is filled with carbon monoxide and other deadly gases and nobody could possibly breather this air and survive."
"What does this mean as far as our flying sauce program is concerned?"
"We shall have to take our own oxygen with us, which means a much heavier flying saucer than we originally planned."
"Are there any other hazards that you discovered in your studier?"
"Take a look at this photo. You see this dark black cloud hovering over the surface of Earth? We call this the Consolidated Edison Belt. We don't know what it is made of, but it could give us a lot of trouble and we shall have to make further tests before we send a Venus Being there."
"Over here you will notice what seems to be a river, but the satellite findings indicate it is polluted and the water is unfit to drink. This means we shall have to carry our own water, which will add even greater weight to the saucer."
"Sir, what are all those tiny black spots on the photographs?"
"We're not certain. They seem to be metal particles that move along certain paths. They emit gases, make noise and keep crashing into each other. There are so many of these paths and so many metal particles that it is impossible to land a flying saucer without its being smashed by one."
"What are those stalagmite projections sticking up?"
"They're some type of granite formations that give off light at night. Prof. Glom has named them skyscrapers since they seem to be scraping the skies."
"If all you say is true, won't this set back the flying saucer program several years?"
"Yes, but we shall proceed as soon as the Grubstart gives us the added funds."
"Prof. Zog, why are we spending billions and billions of zilches to land a flying saucer on Earth when there is no life there?
"Because if we Venusians can learn to breathe in an Earth atmosphere, then we can live anywhere."
NEW WORDS
humorous
a. funny; that makers people laugh 幽默的
humor
n.
essay
n. 散文，随笔
excitement
n. the state or quality of being excited
planet
n. large body in space that moves round a star esp. round the sun 行星
Venusian
a. of or having to do with the plant Venus 金星的
n. supposed Venus being 金星人
satellite
n. spacecraft that goes round the planet earth and sends back radio and television signals; heavenly body that goes round a plant （人造）卫星
signal
n. 信号；暗号
astronomer
n. person who studies the science of the sun, moon, stars and planets
天文学家
telescope
n. instrument with special glasses used for seeing distant things
extremely
ad. very 极端，非常
extreme
a.
feasibility
ad. possibility of being carried or done 可行性
feasible
a.
manned
a. occupied by one or more persons 载人的
saucer
n. 浅碟；茶托
flying saucer
n. 飞碟
conference
n. meeting
press conference
n. meeting arranged by an important person to which news reporters are invited to listen to a statement or ask questions 记者招待会
technology
n. 技术
conclusion
n. decision of opinion reached by reasoning 结论
conclude
v.
reporter
v. person who gathers news for a newspaper, magazine, or radio or TV station 记者
compose
vt. make up, form 组成，构成
concrete
n. building material made by mixing cement with sand, small stones and water 混凝土
atmosphere
n. all the gasses round the earth; air in a place 大气；空气
carbon
n. 碳
monoxide
n. 一氧化物
deadly
a. causing death; likely to cause death 致命的
gas
n. 气体
survive
vi. remain alive; continue to live or exist 活下来；幸存
vt. remain alive after; live longer than 经历...后还活着；比...活得长
survival
n.
program
n. plan of what it to be done 计划
concern
vt. be of importance or interest to; have an effect on 涉及，关系到
oxygen
n. 氧，氧气
originally
ad. formerly 起初，原来
original
a.
hazard
n. danger
hover
vi. stay in or near one place in the air 盘旋
consolidated
a. untied; combined 联合的
consolidate
vt.
belt
n. area that has some special quality; zone （地）带
indicate
vt. show
indication
n.
pollute
vt. make (air, water, soil, etc.) dirty with manmade waste 污染
pollution
n.
unfit
a. not good enough; not suitable
particle
n. 粒子；微粒
emit
vt. send out 散发，射出
emission
n.
crash
v. (cause to) break into pieces violently 坠落；猛撞
smash
v. (cause to) break into pieces violently (使)碎裂
stalagmite
n. 石笋
projection
n. sth. that stands out from a surface 凸出物
type
n. a particular kind, class or group 类型，种类
granite
n. hard grey stone used for building 花岗岩
formation
n. sth. that is formed; way in which sth. is formed 形成（物）
skyscraper
n. very tall building 摩天大楼
scrape
vt. rub with sth. rough or sharp 刮，擦
proceed
vi. continue after having stopped （停顿后）继续进行
fund
n. sum of money set apart or available for a special purpose 资金；基金
billion
n. one thousand million
zilch
n. zero; nothing at all
PHRASES & EXPRESSIONS
(be) known as
also publicly called; named 以...闻名，通常名叫
name after
give the same name as 以...名字命名
as to
about, concerning 关于
base on / upon
use as a basis or foundation for 以...为基础，把...基于
for one thing ... (for another)
in the first place... (in the second place)
be composed of
have as members or parts 由...组成
as far as ... be concerned
to the degree that it matters to 就...而言
stick up
stand upright; project 直立；突出
give off
emit; send out 发出；散发出
set back
delay the advance of development of 耽搁；阻碍
PEOPER NAMES
Art Buchwald
阿特.布奇沃德
Venus
金星
Manhattan
曼哈顿（纽约市中心）
Zog
佐格（姓氏）
Edison
爱迪生（姓氏）
Glom
格洛姆（姓氏）
参考译文——地球上有生命吗？
这是一篇幽默小品。但读完以后你一定会发现，作者写这篇文章是极为严肃的。
地球上有生命吗？
本周金星上群情激动异常。金星上的科学家首次把一颗卫星成功地送上了地球，此后卫星便不断地发回信号和照片。
卫星对准发射的地区叫曼哈顿（是以金星上伟大的天文学家曼哈顿教授命名的，在两万光年之前该教授用望远镜首次发现了这个地区）。
由于天气条件极为有利，信号极为清晰，金星科学家们从而获得了有关载人飞碟能否在地球上着陆的宝贵资料。于是，有关方面在金星理工学院举行了一次记者招待会。
"根据上周发射的卫星所提供的资料，"佐格教授说，"我们已经得出结论：地球上没有生命。"
"这您是怎么知道的呢?"《金星晚报》的科学记者问。
"首先，曼哈顿地区的地球表面均由坚固的混凝土构成，那里什么东西也无法生长。另外，大气层中充满了一氧化碳和其他致命的气体，任何人呼吸了这种空气都不可能幸存下来。"
"这对我们的飞碟计划来说又意味着什么呢?"
"这意味着我们必须随身携带我们所需要的氧气，这样一来，飞碟就要比我们原先计划的重很多。"
"你们在研究中有没有发现其他什么危险呢?"
"请看这张照片。诸位看到在地球表面上方飘浮的这片深黑色的云层吗？我们把它叫做爱迪生联合带。虽然我们还不知道它含有什么成分，但是它很可能会给我们带来许多麻烦，我们还必须做更多的试验，然后才能把金星人送往地球。
"这边，诸位可以看到像是一条河似的东西，不过卫星探测的结果表明它已被污染，河水不适于饮用。这意味着我们必须自己带水，这就会给飞碟增加更多的重量。"
"先生，照片上那些小小的黑点是什么?"
"我们也不清楚。它们好像是一些沿着某些轨道运动的金属微粒。它们排放气体，发出噪音，而且不断地相互碰撞。那儿有很多这样的轨道，很多这样的金属微粒，要使飞碟在那儿着陆而不被某一颗微粒撞毁是很难办到的。"
"那些笔直竖立的石笋状凸出物是什么东西?"
"它们是某种夜间会发光的花岗岩结构。格洛姆教授把它们叫做摩天大楼，因为它们好像已经擦到了天。"
"如果您所说的都是事实，那飞碟计划不就要推迟好多年吗?"
"是的，但一俟格拉布斯塔特贷款基金会把追加的资金给我们，我们就会立即实施这一计划。"
"佐格教授，既然地球上没有生命，那我们为什么还要花费亿万元向那儿发射飞碟呢?"
"因为如果我们金星人能学会在地球的大气层中呼吸的话，那我们就可以在任何地方生存了。"
